A Gentle Guide to Closet Decluttering

The image shows a section of a closet filled with clothing on hangers. The clothes are mostly neutral tones, with a few pops of color. The hangers appear to be made of wood.

Going through your closet can be a surprisingly emotional and challenging experience, especially if you are in recovery for an eating disorder, navigating disordered eating behaviors, or working through struggles with body image. Our closets can hold more than just clothes; they can carry memories, emotions, and even unmet expectations of ourselves. As someone in recovery who understands body grief, I know how daunting this task can feel. But I also know it can be an opportunity to create a space that reflects self-compassion and acceptance.

If you are feeling ready to take on this task, here are some questions to guide you through your process:

If I saw this in a store right now, would I buy it?
(Does it fit my current style, needs, or taste?)
Why did I buy it in the first place? What was my vision for it?
(Was it for a specific occasion or fantasy version of myself?)
Does this piece serve me in my real life? Or my Fantasy Me?
(Is it practical for my day-to-day life?)
Do I actually wear this? Or do I just like the idea of wearing this?
(Am I keeping it because it looks good in theory?)
When was the last time I wore or used this?
(Has it been sitting untouched for months or years?)
Am I keeping this just because of the money?
(Does the financial investment justify keeping it if I do not use it?)
Am I holding onto this because of guilt, nostalgia, or pressure from others?
(Am I keeping it for emotional reasons rather than practicality?)
Does this piece bully me?
(Does it make me feel bad about myself when I see it or try it on?)

Tips for a Supportive Closet Decluttering Process

As you ask yourself these questions, here are some practical tips to help make the process feel more manageable and supportive:

Find a support system. Whether it is a trusted friend, a peer support group, or a therapist, having people who can encourage and uplift you can make all the difference. They can remind you that your worth is not tied to the size or number of clothes you own.
Try body doubling. If tackling your closet feels overwhelming, try inviting someone you trust to sit with you while you work. They don’t need to do anything except offer moral support and help you stay grounded. If an in-person presence isn’t possible, virtual support can be just as effective. Having someone there, whether in person or online, can make the task feel more manageable and less isolating.
Take breaks as needed. Decluttering can bring up strong emotions, so give yourself permission to pause, breathe, or step away if it becomes too much. It is okay to take this process one step at a time.
Create a supportive environment. Put on calming music, light a candle, or create a cozy space to help make the experience feel more nurturing.
Be gentle with yourself. It is okay to feel conflicted or unsure about letting certain pieces go. Remember that you are allowed to keep things if you are not ready to let them go yet. This is your journey, and there is no right or wrong way to go about it.
Focus on the future. Try to center your attention on creating a wardrobe that reflects who you are now and who you are becoming. It is not about "fixing" yourself but about building a space that feels supportive and aligned with your current needs.

A Note of Encouragement

Your closet does not define your worth. It is simply a collection of items that should serve and support you. If a piece of clothing does not do that, it is okay to let it go. Decluttering can be an act of liberation, a step toward creating a space that honors your journey and reflects the person you are today. Be proud of every step you take, no matter how small, toward cultivating a more compassionate relationship with your body and yourself.